Best thing you can do, get off your sorry butt and step away from your computer! Online sites have a purpose but are you actually physically meeting anyone? Some people are addicted to the attention ~ and their ego or internet identity has no intention of pursuing a serious relationship. You can spend hours and waste days feeding an idealized fantasy world.
1. Get outside, walk. Pick a trail, path, sidewalk and use it. I can guarantee you will see other people walking by themselves. Be brave, smile at a few. If you are ready for hero status, say hello. Key point to being a hero, you don’t expect anything in return.
2. Visit your city or town’s main library. Best bet here is to grab a seat (no! no not his, I meant the chair) in the the newspaper and magazine division. This area is usually set up lounge style, with comfy sofas and padded chairs. Grab your favourite daily or show that intriguing possibility sitting across from you what you like to do. Whether you enjoy golf, riding Harley’s, organic gardening, kayaking, epicurian delights or body building, there is a high chance a magazine exists for the likes of you and your hobbies.
Please remember you are in a quiet zone, thus you must be prepared to take action. The library is not the place to strike up a deep conversation. You must find a commonality; like a hobby, interest or activity. And always, always scope the scene out first. Is the person there with a significant other? Check for wedding rings; and depending on someone’s culture rings can be worn on either left or right ring fingers. Still not sure, use that as your in. Bring along a pen and pad of paper. Write a short note and hand it over discreetly. Almost everyone likes to be flattered. Comment on their good taste, based on what they are reading. Inquire in your note whether they are single and if she/he would like to chat over a coffee. Your treat. Be prepared for anything, you may be shut out or he/she could gather up their belongings and say “I know this fabulous coffee shop, around the corner, shall we?” The key is to respect everyone’s boundaries including the other guests in the library.
The best thing about the library, singles don’t stand out here, everyone reads alone.
3. Head over to your local coffee/tea shop. You don’t have to drink coffee or tea. You can also get juices, smoothies, water and snacks. Most coffee shops provide free newspapers and magazines. Or bring your own book, laptop, wireless toy, crossword or Sudoku puzzle. If you truly want to meet other people you will not be listening to your Ipod or MP3. Love your tunes but avoid insulating yourself. When you hook up and must travel with music and technology you are effectively and clearly saying “leave me alone. ” And so you are left alone and always will be until you make yourself available and tune in to the reality happening around you.
Great thing about coffee shops…lots of people traffic, frequent turnover and many are traveling solo.
Smiles work wonders!
Just watch for the sharks…but that is another story.